Love
by DJ Moves
Summary: Kaiba has just been dumped by Otogi. He starts thinking about his past relationships, taking his future in his own hands.


Title: Love  
  
Author: JD  
  
Rating: R  
  
Summery: Kaiba's thought's after being dumped by Otogi. Darkish.  
  
God, I'm so fucking stupid.  
  
Me, Seto Kaiba, the fucking genius.  
  
I really am stupid.  
  
It started out innocently enough.  
  
It started out with another failed relationship. This time Otogi. He packed his bags and left for his apartment while I watched with indifference. He didn't offer any explanation, but did I really need one? What else is new, I was dumped?  
  
Of course, it didn't help it was my fifth unsuccessful relationship in a year.  
  
First it was Yami. Tensions flared during a "friendly" duel, he pulled me down onto the floor and proceeded to take my virginity. I was intoxicated by this feeling. I knew I wasn't in love and it would only be a short time before Yami noticed this. But for the first three weeks we were in lustful bliss.  
  
Next was Ryou. He was a trusting person. So I used that to my advantage. My sexual appetite far surpassed Jou's normal one and Ryou was willing to put out for love. Of course, my temper got in the way of everything. I couldn't stand how pure-hearted he was and innocent... So I kicked him out. It lasted two and a half months.  
  
Then they stayed away from me so it was up to my fist to keep me satisfied.  
  
And as any male will know, it wasn't enough.  
  
So number three was that dope Honda. He had a sex drive, though it was hard, at first, to get him to want to sleep with me. Me being a guy and all. So I learned a great trick with him. Let them seduce you the first time and you have complete control over them. I got sick, however, of his irritating personality so I was a jerk to him until he "broke it off." It was a month or two thing.  
  
Next was, of course, Jounochi. I actually kind of fell for him, though. He was the first one to catch onto my pattern of relationships, so started us out on "strictly fucking." I think that hard-to-get thing made him more desirable. I was in bliss, even when he was fucking me. I made an effort to get him to like me. And it worked. Slowly. We began kissing when we fucked. He wouldn't leave right afterward. He hung out on weekends and we did things together Unofficial dates.  
  
I didn't realize, at the time, I was falling for him.  
  
I was fucking him. Hard, fast. He looked like he was getting made love to, like he always did. It was cute. Like always. But I ignored it, slamming into him with everything. When I collapsed onto him, he met me in a long kiss, that I finally broke from, gasping. As I raced to catch my breath, he traced his finger along my features, staring at me with a peaceful look on his face. He whispered, as I bent in and began kissing at his neck, leaving my ownership mark on him again, "Kaiba...I want you to know...I love you."  
  
I sat straight up, staring at him. "Get out," I finally said.  
  
He looked at me, confused, scared, worried. "I..."  
  
"Get the fuck out!" I burst out, smacking him hard.  
  
His hand flew up to his cheek, nursing his wound, as tears sprang up in his eyes. He jumped up, staring at me, the sheet falling off his lean frame. He was shaking, gasping, then he exploded. "You fucking jerk!" he screamed at me, making a lunge for me.  
  
I was unprepared for the attack. He hit me squarely in the jaw, knocking me down on the bed. Hot tears fell from his eyes as he slammed fist after fist into my body. "You're a fucking jerk, Kaiba!" he screamed, slapping me hard across the face. "How's it feel, huh?" he asked, angrily, pulling his clothes on. "You really had me there for a minute, Kaiba. I actually thought you cared about me. Oh, was I ever wrong, right Kaiba?" He kept saying my name in this way that made me feel worse than what he was actually saying.  
  
"But I should of know, right? You used all my other friends and now you were just using me. So I iinsisted/i we keep it purely physical. But then you did that...thing." He was fighting back a sob as he stared at me, softer tears forming in his eyes. He closed his eyes and looked down, the tears finally spilling. "I was nuts to think you'd love me. I was just another warm body to slam yourself into."  
  
He turned to leave, then stopped, bursting out in a bitter laugh. "What do I expect from the person who calls me a worthless mutt?" He walked out of my life after five months.  
  
So why am I stupid?  
  
Because I'm lying here, in a pool of my own blood, waiting for an ambulance or death.  
  
I missed my heart.  
  
I was stupid, I should have positioned it at my temple or in my mouth, but I chose the heart.  
  
I missed.  
  
I think I hit my lung instead. I can't breathe very well, so I imagine I ruptured it. Shattered the rips, too, right? I imagine.  
  
At first, I was expecting an ambulance to come. I iknew/i it'd be there. Just knew it. But it never came.  
  
I feel my eyes closing and I don't try to fight it as I suddenly feel very peaceful.  
  
I die with a sad smile on my face. 


End file.
